Why Flattery Works

Why Flattery Works
Sunday, November 24, 2019
by Dr. Paul Chappell

“Then these presidents and princes assembled together to the king, and said thus unto him, King Darius, live for ever. All the presidents of the kingdom, the governors, and the princes, the counsellors, and the captains, have consulted together to establish a royal statute, and to make a firm decree, that whosoever shall ask a petition of any God or man for thirty days, save of thee, O king, he shall be cast into the den of lions. Now, O king, establish the decree, and sign the writing, that it be not changed, according to the law of the Medes and Persians, which altereth not.”

Daniel 6:6–8

When Daniel’s enemies tried to find an avenue of attack against him, they could not find anywhere in his duties where Daniel was cutting corners or doing anything wrong. So they decided to attack him for his faith. The courtiers went to King Darius and flattered him into signing a law outlawing praying to anyone else, human or divine. This sounded good to the king, because it placed him on a very high level indeed. And that is why flattery works—because it tells us what we want to hear.

This is far from an ancient phenomenon. According to a study conducted by researchers affiliated with the College Boards, the company that manages the SAT testing process, in 2016, fully 47 percent of US high school seniors graduated with an A average. The trend is referred to as “grade inflation” and it reflects the desire people have to be told they are doing well whether that reflects reality or not. The problem, of course, is that the rise in grades being handed out is not matched by an increase in learning and excellence in education. Flattery is a dangerous weapon that can be subtly used against us to lower our own standards. If we allow ourselves to be convinced that everything is fine, we will not make needed changes.

Today's Growth Principle:
Be willing to listen to the truth, even if it is not what you would prefer to hear.