What love has taught Meg? =)

What love has taught Meg?

Our mind is an essential part to create a lasting decision in our lives. It can choose what to dwell deep inside our hearts. Some of us might be blessed enough to know the right person to keep for life, others are not. Well, ‘I was’ part of the others so to speak. I can say ‘was’ because it’s a past tense. It’s the learning curve that I am not afraid to tell and share because without it love to its fullest will never be the same and more meaningful to me.

In my previous article, we discussed about family matters. The importance of parents in upbringing his/her own child. No matter how parents can be good to their own child, the child will still has his/her own environment aside from home. As the child grows older, many people will come along into his/her own life in church, school, office and many other places…the external factors that as a child, he/she will always be part of. By nature, that’s part of growing up and usually the independence of a child will start at the age of 12. He/she wants to know his/her own identity and undeniably a child starts to like someone whom he/she admired of. An affection or attraction that is normal and for definite reason, it’s advisable that a child needs to be more open to their parents, and as parents, we have to be more willing to listen, guide and pray for them; a proper guidance is strongly recommended.

Many countries, ‘arranged marriage’ is still part of a culture and tradition that’s hard to break… a preplanned wedlock that both parties have to deal with… can someone imagine the feelings of a force love that an individual has to accept? Conditional. Selfish. Unhappy. Freedom equates to choose who’s to love… a love that’s natural, nurturing, flourishing, overflowing and worth sharing. To some, people might not bless enough to have their first love to be their wife or husband in their life, but the reality is… it was a choice. Behind the unseen scars of the heart lives the eternal wisdom of the mind. A wisdom that both explored and realized… parents cannot taught all the actual experiences that a child has to discover, it is the child himself/herself only to feel it. The strength of a child can never be measured if he/she himself/herself will not able to take the test. The loss of someone will help the person to feel the real meaning of pain, suffering, heartbreak. Uncontrolled situations allow the person to grow and with the child within him/her, it brings back the joy of good memories that his/her parents allow to save and store in his/her memory. This is a strong coping mechanism for him/her to move on and let go. For a child, it is a beginning to embrace the new season of his/her life. The life which is too beautiful and wonderful… its beauty is even more significant appreciating the aftermath of these unwanted circumstances.

Happiness to move and let go of a wrong relationship is also a choice… a choice that requires time to heal, not to force to mend but gradually and naturally allowing the recovery process of the heart to happen. A part of a realization that I eventually accept and let go. The ‘first love’ I had encountered forced himself to love again yet deep within his heart he was still broken... an empty space within his heart that he wanted to let go yet still hunting him from the past.  I thought he’s well enough to start again yet I was wrong. Forgiveness and acceptance were the right things I able to choose despite of the excruciating pain in my heart. It was a choice… a good choice that I had learned from my ‘child in me’ when I needed to face the reality… a precious teaching from my parents who able to save and store these kind of virtues within me. I learned more that in forgiveness and acceptance, gratitude will eventually flows from the bottom of my heart.

Love defines to be selfless…a love that loves to see others’ happiness even if I wasn’t part of that happiness. I believed that everything is to be equal, fair and just. We cannot allow someone to dwell in our hearts, if that someone feels and thinks about someone else. We cannot allow being with someone physically if in his/her mind and heart belongs to someone else. Let it go. It is easier to say then done yet the real test lies in the understanding of what is right and healthy for both the heart and the mind. Everyone deserves to love and to be loved… again.

Let us be reminded that Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. I learned to define, to feel, to think, to appreciate and to love it more. The wisdom that love has taught me was truly amazing. It reminds me of a diamond stone that represents a woman’s heart, the cuts on all its edges allow the diamond to shine even brighter. The metal gold refines by fire, so as adversity refines the heart…No wonder why it’s a symbol for an engagement… a diamond just like the heart that is priceless, precious, special and rare.  

Indeed, let us nurture and love the love that we have because the love in our hearts will always be the fountain wellspring of our lives. =)