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The Torment of Not Forgiving
by Dr. Paul Chappell
“Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt, because thou desiredst me: Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee? And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.”
Matthew 18:32–35
When Peter asked how often he had to forgive someone who had wronged him, apparently seeking to limit the extent of forgiveness, Jesus responded with the parable of a king who was owed a massive sum by one of his servants. Instead of demanding the repayment that was rightly his, he freely forgave the debt, giving the man new hope for his future. But the servant who was forgiven was also owed a debt. Rather than extending the same grace he had been shown, he demanded full repayment, grabbing the man by the throat and throwing him into jail.
Forgiveness is one of the issues that many Christians struggle with, because to truly forgive someone from the heart, we have to take our hands away from their throats and give up our right to insist that they get what is coming to them. Many hold grudges for years rather than take this important step. The problem is that when we do not forgive, it has far greater consequences for us than to the person who has wronged us. It harms our health both spiritually and physically when we insist on carrying the weight of past offenses. And as severe as the consequences on human relationships are, a failure to forgive destroys our close fellowship with God. “But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:15).
Matthew 18:32–35
When Peter asked how often he had to forgive someone who had wronged him, apparently seeking to limit the extent of forgiveness, Jesus responded with the parable of a king who was owed a massive sum by one of his servants. Instead of demanding the repayment that was rightly his, he freely forgave the debt, giving the man new hope for his future. But the servant who was forgiven was also owed a debt. Rather than extending the same grace he had been shown, he demanded full repayment, grabbing the man by the throat and throwing him into jail.
Forgiveness is one of the issues that many Christians struggle with, because to truly forgive someone from the heart, we have to take our hands away from their throats and give up our right to insist that they get what is coming to them. Many hold grudges for years rather than take this important step. The problem is that when we do not forgive, it has far greater consequences for us than to the person who has wronged us. It harms our health both spiritually and physically when we insist on carrying the weight of past offenses. And as severe as the consequences on human relationships are, a failure to forgive destroys our close fellowship with God. “But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:15).
Today’s Growth Principle:
Forgiveness isn’t changing the past; it is letting God be the judge of the past and freeing yourself for a brighter future.
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