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A Fractured Family Background Isn’t Fatal
by Dr. Paul Chappell
“Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colours. And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him.”
Genesis 37:3–4
For an example of a deeply dysfunctional family, we have only to look to the one in which Joseph grew up. His father Jacob played favorites, not just with his sons but with his wives. Joseph’s mother died when he was young, and his father latched on to Joseph as a result. Because of that favoritism, Joseph’s brothers hated him and when the opportunity arose they were going to kill him, but decided to sell him into slavery instead and pocket the money. When they got home they told their father Jacob that they had found Joseph’s coat of many colors covered in blood, and that he had been killed. Joseph certainly had every reason to hold a grudge about his experiences growing up.
Yet though his pain was real, Joseph was not bound by his past. Joseph recognized that God could use even the worst things that happened to him for good—provided that he was willing to trust God with the process. We see Joseph’s understanding of this truth revealed in the birth and naming of his children. “And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, said he, hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father’s house. And the name of the second called he Ephraim: For God hath caused me to be fruitful in the land of my affliction” (Genesis 41:51–52) Before we can be fruitful, we have to forget the past—not in the sense that we pretend it didn’t happen, but that we release our claim to retaliation against those who have done us wrong. Only then can we enjoy God’s fruitfulness in our lives.
Genesis 37:3–4
For an example of a deeply dysfunctional family, we have only to look to the one in which Joseph grew up. His father Jacob played favorites, not just with his sons but with his wives. Joseph’s mother died when he was young, and his father latched on to Joseph as a result. Because of that favoritism, Joseph’s brothers hated him and when the opportunity arose they were going to kill him, but decided to sell him into slavery instead and pocket the money. When they got home they told their father Jacob that they had found Joseph’s coat of many colors covered in blood, and that he had been killed. Joseph certainly had every reason to hold a grudge about his experiences growing up.
Yet though his pain was real, Joseph was not bound by his past. Joseph recognized that God could use even the worst things that happened to him for good—provided that he was willing to trust God with the process. We see Joseph’s understanding of this truth revealed in the birth and naming of his children. “And Joseph called the name of the firstborn Manasseh: For God, said he, hath made me forget all my toil, and all my father’s house. And the name of the second called he Ephraim: For God hath caused me to be fruitful in the land of my affliction” (Genesis 41:51–52) Before we can be fruitful, we have to forget the past—not in the sense that we pretend it didn’t happen, but that we release our claim to retaliation against those who have done us wrong. Only then can we enjoy God’s fruitfulness in our lives.
Today’s Growth Principle:
Though our upbringing may leave scars, God is able to use even painful experiences for His purposes.
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